Where Is The Line Between Kinky Sex And Vanilla?
When I first wrote Giving It Up, I shipped it off to my writing buddies and critique groups. The general consensus was that the sex was emotional and hot. That suited me just fine.
Then one day, a published author who I didn’t know very well at the time, sent me a note: “great Dom”. Um, what? At first I wondered if she’d mixed up which story she was giving feedback for.
I mean, I know what’s up in the genre of BDSM romance. I read plenty of it. I even write it. In fact, one of the supporting characters is a sadist, and I hope to write his story one day.
However, I never intended for Giving It Up to be BDSM. Not really. Allie and Colin have sex, and lots of it. Hot sex. But it’s… mostly missionary. Even when they switch things up, a different position, some fun oral – that’s still standard vanilla sex fare, right?
The truth is, she was right. Colin, the hero of Giving It Up, is a Dom. He would never call himself that. He would never be caught dead in leather pants. He wants a good fucking, not a lot of pomp and circumstance.
So what makes him a Dom?
- When Allie approaches him, she knows what she wants. She wants it rough, dirty and hella anonymous. Colin considers this, considers her, and sees beneath the bravado. Instead of pain and humiliation, he insists on a gentle touch, a mindblowing orgasm and an offer of friendship. Instead of giving her what she wants, he gives her what she needs. That’s true dominance.
- Allie’s a bit skittish after this. I mean, mindblowing orgasms are all well and good, but a guy who looks tough but acts gentle? A man who knows her better than she does herself? Terrifying. Unacceptable. Thankfully, Colin’s also patient, sometime which I consider a huge selling point in a Dom.
- But Allie has bigger things to worry about. She’s in trouble. In danger. But thankfully, Colin is looking out for her. Even when she doesn’t know it, he’s taking care of her. Because whether a Dom spanks you or makes you come, or tells you what to do or goes along with you, the most important thing a Dom should do is protect his girl. And he’s going to keep her.
Kinky sex isn’t a position. It’s not a coy, “yes, Master” offered as a tease. And it’s sure as hell not fluffy handcuffs—no. BDSM is about the mindset. How that’s accomplished is going to vary a lot, and that’s okay.
What makes Colin and Allie’s sex kinky is his inescapable dominance and care paired with her inherent submissiveness. No matter the setting or position or props, the power exchange is genuine and all-encompassing.
They don’t need to use the formal terminology—it would be superfluous for them, because they live it. Colin knows she’s submissive because she obeys him, she pleases him. Allie knows he’s dominant because he controls her, he cares for her.
So when it came time to slap a label on Giving It Up, Loose Id termed it “BDSM suspense”. Well, that suits me just fine.
Giving It Up
by Amber Lin
Publisher: Loose ID
Release Date: June 18, 2012
Allie prowls the club for a man who will use her hard and then ditch her. Hey, it's not rape if she wants it. Instead she finds Colin, who looks tough but treats her tenderly, despite her protests.
He tempts her, but kindness and a few mindblowing orgasms aren't enough to put her back together again. Allie has no hope for a real relationship. Two years ago her best friend betrayed her in the worst possible way – she’d be stupid to trust a man again. Besides, she has her daughter to think of, the only good thing to have come from that dark night.
But when her rapist returns, threatening her sanity and custody of her daughter, Allie turns to Colin. Under his protection and patient touch, Allie begins to heal and learns to hope. Colin’s no saint, though, and his criminal past draws danger of its own. Allie must fight to protect her child and the man she loves, hoping her newfound power will be enough to save them all.
"A ballsy departure from romantic conventions. At once gritty and tender, stark and hopeful."
—Cara McKenna, author of Willing Victim
"Giving It Up is an erotic, compelling story that takes us to the shadowy, lonely places but doesn't leave us there. Amber Lin shows us that romance isn't just for the rich and shiny. Love can find its way even into the dark corners of the most damaged hearts."
—Tiffany Reisz, author of The Siren
Excerpt
When we exited the club, I couldn’t help sucking in several deep breaths. Even the faint smell of street sewage was refreshing, washing the stench of smoke, alcohol, and countless perfumes from my lungs. I never liked the crowds. The press of bodies, the mingling smell of sweat, the small bumps from all around. Tiny violations that were somehow okay since everyone did it.
As my heart rate settled, he inspected me as if he could read me. He couldn’t. “What’s your name?” I asked to distract him.
“Colin. Yours?”
“Allie.”
“Nice to meet you, Allie. Your place or mine?”
I was comfortable again. I knew this play: horny girl who can’t wait to get naked.
“We don’t need to go anywhere. Let’s get started right here.” I let a soft moan escape me and clasped myself to the brick wall named Colin. Never mind that I was dry as a bone. He wouldn’t notice. They never did.
He raised his eyebrows. “In the parking lot?”
“Or in my car. Whatever. I just want you to do me.”
“I’m not fucking you in a car. It’s forty degrees out.”
I was hardly in this for comfort. I’d done it in colder weather just this past winter. “I don’t mind.”
“Well, I do.”
“Fine.” I was willing to give him so much. Why couldn’t he take it the way I wanted? “Then we can go to the motel over there. You’re paying.”
He didn’t look happy. I wasn’t either, but I couldn’t budge on this. Going to an apartment might be the norm for hookups, but my hookups weren’t normal.
Going to their houses where they might do God knows what was out of the question. And I wasn’t about to bring one of these guys near Bailey.
“Not there,” he said. “I’ll pick the place.”
I followed his truck in my car to a motel about ten minutes away. When I pulled in, he waved me to a parking spot next to his truck and went into the office.
The place wasn’t fancy, but the manicured shrubbery and freshly painted building proclaimed this was an entirely different kind of establishment than the dump by the club. No renting rooms by the hour here.
The sign out front advertised $119.99 a night. A typical price for Chicago, but I sweated the cost. The extravagance of my six-dollar drink from earlier paled in comparison.
What if it was too much money? I might not be worth it.
I kept watch on the frosted office door like he might disappear. Eight minutes later, he came out. My stomach clenched. He flashed a key and nodded toward the back before getting into his truck. I followed him in my car and pulled up beside him again.
It was dark back here. Deserted. The only light came from flickering, yellow lamps dimmed by tiny hordes of bugs. Scattered buildings slumbered around us like a nest of dragons, their snore the low drone from the appliances. It wasn’t exactly safe. Technically that was what I wanted, but the allure of danger only worked up to a point.
Amber Lin loves to read angsty romance with plenty of sex, so it was no surprise that her debut book turned out to be erotic romance set against a dark urban landscape. She writes with one rule in mind: it has to get worse before it can get better. She lives with her husband, son and passel of puppy dogs in the great state of Texas.
Giveaway:
Amber Lin will be awarding the following prizes during her blog tour:
· One randomly drawn winner from each blog will receive a Giving It Up Swag Pack, which includes romance trading cards, a signed cover flat, a signature soap bar for showers together handcrafted by AnaBanana Creations and a $10 Amazon gift card.
· One randomly drawn commenter on the tour will win an erotic romance prize pack, including paperback copies of Bared to You by Sylvia Day, Simply Carnal by Kate Pearce, Lessons in Letting Go by Cara McKenna (print combo of Willing Victim and Curio), Comfort Object by Annabel Joseph, a collection of signed Giving It Up swag AND a $50 Amazon Gift Card (BN.com or All Romance may be substituted)
To Enter:
Leave a comment or question for Amber and include your email address.
Be sure to visit the other blogs on this tour. Click on the tour button below for a list of participating blogs. Good luck and thanks for stopping by.
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